by Naomi Manley-Casimir | Apr 8, 2019 | Big Ideas, link, Courage, Fuel Your Passion, Joy, High Achievers, Life lessons, Self-treatment, Self-reflection, Working Moms | 2 comments
Successful company executive, wife, mommy, sister, aunt, friend. Loving life, cooking and yoga. Let"s be grateful, laugh and prosper together.
You are watching: Find out who you are and do it on purpose
The other day I was watching the movie Dumplin’. For those of you who have actually checked out it, you’ll recognize that the personalities in the movie are astronomical Dolly Parton fans. And this quote from Dolly Parton comes up a pair of times:
“Figure Out Who You Are, and Do It On Purpose”.
And both components of this statement really resonated via me. So let me break it dvery own.
Figure Out Who You Are
Remember as soon as you were a kid and acquired up eextremely day and did your thing? You weren’t confused about that you were. And you didn’t should number it out.
I don’t know about you, but for me, over time, my experiences, whether positive or negative, have been layered on height of that care-totally free boy, and crafted that I am.
In the Early Days
According to my Mum and Dad, I was precocious, smart boy analysis by the age of 4. And I could organize my very own in conversations through adults, speaking in complete sentences incredibly at an early stage, to the surpclimb and also amazement of our neighbours.
One of my early on memories was when we moved to our new residence in Coquitlam – I was around 4 years old – and I discovered a red rock. (Actually, it was a small item of red brick, but I didn’t recognize that). I brought that little bit red rock around in my pocket every day for numerous days in a row.
My Dad was building a retaining rock wall in our garden and as he shoveled the cement in in between the rocks, he asked me if I wanted to put my red rock in the wall. He told me that if I did, I wouldn’t lose it, and I would be able to come and check out if whenever before I wanted.
I remember he offered me the alternative. And he waited patiently for my decision.
After a minute or 2, I agreed and also I pumelted my bit red rock into a spot in the wall. I remember skipping away happy because my little bit red rock was safe and also secure.
Years later, I can still go by that retaining wall and also check out my little red rock. It was a tiny anchor to my brand-new home and also by putting it into the wall, it ended up being a long-term reminder of that confident choice I had made as a little girl.
You Kbrand-new Yourself – You Didn’t Have to “Figure It Out”
I remember a conversation via my Mum about what kind of task I would want to have actually once I grew up, and I said something without the majority of civilization.
And then I modified that to be, not a research lab wright here I occupational by myself, yet something in in between.
It’s funny bereason as soon as I did my Myers Briggs personality test in my late teenagers, I found that I am an introvert. That in fact, I do need time alone to regain my power. And it’s exceptional that my little self kbrand-new that intuitively.
These stories highlight a little little bit about that I was as a young boy and exactly how I knew myself at an early age.
But not all childhood memories are happy ones…
A Formative Moment
When I remained in kindergarten, the teacher wanted to teach the class a song. She wanted to sing the verse initially and also wanted us to listen, and then we’d have a chance to sing along.
I loved to sing.
And I knew the song.
The initially time, she began to sing and also I sang with her. I suppose, I knew the song, right? She quit singing, and also asked us to listen first, and then sing after that.
She started to sing again, and also I sang with her aobtain. Sucount the instructions were for those who did not understand the song. She quit and also reiterated that she wanted us all to listen first and then sing thereafter.
When she began to sing aget, I sang in addition to her. Well at this allude, she lost her cool and also slapped me throughout the face, hard.
I cried and also cried.
I didn’t tell my Mum or Dad what happened. In truth, this might be the extremely initially time that I’ve told anyone, yet my husband also, about what happened. My kindergarten classmates may or may not remember this incident but I absolutely perform.
Anymeans, I didn’t talk around it at all because I assumed I’d gain in a lot of trouble, and also I had actually already been slapped throughout the face!
I didn’t realize that my teacher had overstepped her bounds. That HER actions wasn’t appropriate.
The leskid I took amethod from this suffer was: FOLLOW THE RULES.
So that carecomplimentary, precocious son I was – well, she ended up being a smart, articulate, rule-complying with, risk-aware woguy – a perfectionist.
Do It On Purpose
Purpose have the right to be a loaded word. But as the second fifty percent of this expression, I prefer it.
Figure out who you are, and perform it on function.
So what does it expect to be yourself on purpose?
It means be intentional. In those moments of choice, pick being who you are. Choose yourself.
I’ve been reasoning about this in a couple of ways:Be BraveBring your whole self to the table.
When Sheryl Sandberg’s book, Lean In, came out, I read it and the majority of her advice resonated through me. In certain, two of her concepts really made a distinction and also in providing valuable methods to be brave:Sit at the TableKeep Your Foot on the Gas PedalSit at the Table
In her book, Sheryl talks about just how woguys tfinish to accommodate everyone else. You go into a meeting and there aren’t enough seats for everyone, and also the womales will certainly take a seat on the external edge of the room.
Sheryl claims “Sit at the Table”.
After I review that advice, I make a point of constantly taking a seat at the table. The table is wright here the discussion takes area, that’s where the folks who are contributing to the discussion are seated.
By choosing to “Sit at the Table”, you are making a conscious decision to get involved in the conversation. And as a introvert, wright here my organic instinct is to listen and absorb, I need to make a mindful decision to sheight up.Keep Your Foot on the Gas Pedal
‘Keep your foot on the gas pedal’ is also useful advice for me. Sandberg talks around exactly how when womales start planning their families, we could not take on the project or the complicated duty bereason we understand that we can not be tright here with the entirety timeframe.
But assuming your health permits, and based on the nature of your function, you might have the ability to perform just as a lot as soon as you’re pregnant as you have the right to as soon as you’re not. Just because you’re pregnant doesn’t expect your brain falls short or that you can’t add as a lot as anyone else in that role.
There’s additionally a chance that someone else who takes on the duty would additionally not have the ability to view the job with to completion, for whatever factor.
When I was pregnant with my daughter, I led program distribution throughout several projects. Throughout this time, I did the duty properly, even though I worked fewer hours and also didn’t invest as a lot energy as I frequently would in an effort to balance my energy and also the requirements of the project.
I was surprised once I accomplished the incredibly highest possible level of performance acknowledgment we had in place for my contribution in the time of this time as I felt choose I had actually eased off the gas pedal from my ‘normal’ effort.
When there were some alters at job-related, and my job-related was slow, I told my husband also it was a great time to try for our second kid. When I acquired pregnant through my son, my duty at occupational obtained busier, of course. But I was still able to run three workstreams and also make a far-ranging influence in the months prior to I left on maternity leave.
Bring Your Whole Self to the Table
At my worklocation, Accenture, we are on a journey to come to be the a lot of truly human organization in the civilization. The initiative we have actually underway encourages each of us to carry our entirety self to occupational. The good, the negative and also the ugly.
It’s a lot simpler to be positive once we’re feeling good, but we all have actually times as soon as we’re not at our finest. Tright here are so many type of components that deserve to influence our power and perspectives – sleep, stress, workfill, busy-ness, overwhelm and as a whole health, both mental and physical. It’s necessary to be able to lug that you are to the table.
Now this doesn’t intend that if you’re having a stormy day, you need to spcheck out that about to everyone roughly you. But it also doesn’t intend that you need to hide what’s going on for you from others.
Tright here is a careful balance to strike when you’re a leader. As a leader, your words and also actions affect the majority of others.
As my colleague Katherine states, “Checking your mindset at the door is exceptionally important” – as a leader, your attitude has a disproportionate span of influence.
So, if you must acquire something off your chest, choose your venting companion wisely.
There’s Value in Unique Experience
My experiences have taught me different lessons than others might have learned. There’s value in my distinct endure and in my capability to share that through others. These distinct experiences may use to a selection of facets of life: family, relationships, work, etc. But my suffer, my course, is various than everyone else’s. So be confident that you, your suffer, your perspective is valuable and is sufficient.
Figure Out Who You Are, and Do It On Purpose
From the external, looking at Dolly Parton, she certainly seems choose someone that is living her life as herself on objective.
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I wish that for each of you.
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